Weekly: August 14th - August 20th

Goodbye, sweet Maria.

Chicken Recipe:

Equal parts onion powder, garlic powder, smoked paprika, touch of cumin and touch of cinnamon. Salt and pepper liberally. Rub this all in with some quality olive oil, squeeze half a lemon in it. Cut up some dill and green onions for the people in the back. Do it all by feel. I ain’t measuring shit because I’m a hobby cook, not a software engineer. Coat this big mess in plain greek yogurt and leave it in the fridge for 4-8 hours (for bone-in chicken thighs).

Get out a frying pan and sear each thigh with butter for 2 mins or so per side. We want to seal the outer layer by cooking it so the juices remain. After they’re all seared, chuck it in the oven until your thickest thigh hits 160, then pull it. It will continue cooking to a safe temperature. Serve with a beaming smile and some sort of greek salad. Congratulations.

Lucky numbers:

97, 4 , 8 , 14

Lucky foods:

Lobster, Lucky Charms, La Salumeria, Garlic Linguine

Watch out for:

Subway man, subway man walking back, humidity, Maria’s son

Line of the week:

“No, no, best to leave me out of the plans. I’m 72. I’m on borrowed time. Both my parents dropped dead at 74. Get someone else to help.”